Spotted on a wall in the brewhouse at St. Louis Brewery’s Bottleworks: “Uncle Tupelo rates the beers.”

Obviously dated since Uncle Tupelo - born just a few miles away, and across the Mississippi River, in Belleville, Ill. - broke up in 1994. But still fun, and it didn’t hurt that The Band was belting out “The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down” on the brewhouse stereo while I scribbled some notes.

Budweiser - Statement on how f–ked up the world is. Should not be the msot popular beer in the world. Just proves that sexism in advertising gets you anywhere.

Miller - Good, but we shouldn’t admit drinking it - look was happened to the Long Ryders and The Del Fuegos.

Black Label - Rare delicacy, hard to find.

Michelob Dry - Wet, good for breakfast.

Heineken - All the best things in life smell bad.

Bass Ale - Good fish. Good beer.

Red, White & Blue - Role model, cheap date, highest recommendation.

Old Milwaukee - Only beer that hangs out in the refrigerator for longer than a week, last resort.

Pabst - Old man beer, check back in 30 years.

Schlitz - Functional beer.

Old Style - Probably why all the bands in Chicago suck (just kidding).

Strohs - Forgettable.

Corona - Too many requirements. Evil stigma.

Fosters - Love it on payday, love those sulfites.

Olympia - Grunts, groans, flashbacks, etc. Never referred to by full name.

Coors - Mussolini’s choice. Heavy metal beer.

Stag - Hometown beer, goes good with adolescence, rest in peace.

EKU 28 - Most potent beer in the world, good ice cream topping.

Maybe the group should reunite just to put together an updated list.

Posted: September 12th, 2006 under Drinking notes.