I am not a brewery

Requests like this seem to arrive in cycles and unfortunately we’re in an up cycle.

So I thought I’d pass one of them along, in this case with the name and contact information removed. The subject line is “My Home Museum Beer.” I’m not trying to be anti-social but the PS tickled me (I don’t usually read that far).

Hello.
My name is [removed]. I the citizen of the Ukraine. I the big admirer and the collector of Beer and beermats. I have my own family collection.
In addition to beer and beermats I collect any information concerning alcoholic production and alcoholic manufacture.
Now I work as that that I collect the catalogue of brands various alcoholic drinks from all world.
I plan to write the book – the catalogue about the description of drinks, the companies, and features of cocktails. I hope for the big circulation and popularity of this book.
If it probably I like to ask from you the information on your company and about beer made by your company.
From myself personally I would like to ask and to you would be grateful for what or a souvenir with a logo of your brewery in my collection.
I hope I have not taken away from you a lot of time the request.
Yours faithfully [name removed].

My adress:
[details removed]
Makeevka
86154
UKRAINE
P.S.: Perhaps you have received many requests for souvenirs from Ukraine, Russia, Belarus, and probably faced with such people as lovers freebies. I am very ashamed of these people. Please do not ignore my message.

See, I didn’t.

6 thoughts on “I am not a brewery”

  1. I just got the EXACT SAME email, probably at the same time. Cracks me up. I wonder if it ever works and if so, what they actually get out of it. Maybe it’s worth a shot.

    What can I say, I’m a lovers freebies…

  2. There is an automotive blog I occasionally visit that once received a request to purchase auto parts. Despite informing the inquirer that they did not sell anything they were told that they had “no good cotomer sevis.” So Stan, how is your cotomer sevis?

  3. At The Beer Festival Calendar, we get all kinds of strange requests. We’ve been asked for everything from advice on how to market T-shirts and beer steins to help with hotel reservations and transportation to festival venues.

    The all-time best was a request for advice from someone purporting to be a festival organizer in northern Nigeria. That part of the country is in the midst of a civil war between Christians and teetotaling Muslims.

  4. Dang Stan! I thought you brewed!

    I wanted to get you some of our NM hops to brew a few batches with. Oh well,,,,,if you change your mind,,let me know.

    Just wanted to give you some nice hops to try.

    Heck,,we even have breeding culls for sale that you may like to grow AND brew with,,,if you did that kind of stuff.

    Heck,,if you come by to pick up some hops,,we even have some homebrews of those very hops to try!

    If you only were a brewery.

    And what scale is that definition? A legal one?

    Just messing around Stan,,,come get some hops! Time to grow.

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